SpareParts Joque – Review

In the interest of full disclosure I should point out that I was sent this item free to review. However this review expresses my own personal and honest opinion and experience.

I was sent a SpareParts Joque to review from Bioconcept. The Joque  sizing, while less complicated than the Tomboi which I have reviewed previously, comes in two sizes called ‘A’ and ‘B’.  There is a chart on the website and indeed a handy video to watch to help with sizing. In my case my hip measurement would have fitted either size but my sizing was on the boundary for thighs, so taking my cue from the Tomboi sizing I opted for the larger size ‘B’.

When the arrived they came in a plain black box with a cardboard sleeve around it. All the packaging details are on the sleeve allowing it to be removed if you want to give this as a gift say. Inside the box there was the harness itself and a zip up pouch. As I have the ‘passion pink’ harness the pouch is in the same pink. The outer cardboard sleeve bears a pink sticker denoting the colour however the pink was much paler than the sticker itself, the photographs on the website give a good indication of the actual colour.

Joque close upMy first impression was that it looks like a climbing harness and the mass of straps is somewhat disconcerting. The Joque consists of a wide black waistband with the spare parts logo on the front, two narrower black straps to go around your thighs and a small triangle of silky fabric (this is the pink part of the harness) with two flaps which sit behind the dildo when in use.

A closer examination reveals that as the Joque has no buckles the straps form continuous loops with Velcro and clips to adjust it. This means that you have to step into it. I loosened off straps where I could and climbed in. I was now standing in a mass of straps.

One of the straps I had loosened was the waistband so I was now attempting to refasten the Velcro behind me. Tightening the thigh straps seemed much easier though required two hands to adjust the loop and the clip. Still it was a bit of a challenge to hold it in place and adjust it and I felt ungainly and awkward. This really required help from another person. This is offset by the fact that once adjusted the elastic is stretchy enough that one can climb out of it without unfastening it, so once adjusted it becomes much easier to slip on and off.

Next it was time for action. The rubber O-ring is slightly smaller than the Tomboi’s but accommodated my largest dildo easily enough and I tucked the flaps behind it. At this point I stepped into it and pulled it up. The dildo itself sat nicely in position and the fabric was wonderfully soft and comfortable. Mat lay down on his front and I moved behind him to slide into him. Now with weight on the harness I used the clips on the waistband to tighten it slightly, easy enough to do with one hand. Everything sat firmly and I could pound into him with pleasure.

The straps leave one’s bottom exposed although the fabric part of the harness goes far enough round that it would prevent vaginal penetration. This left me enjoying the feeling of being very nearly naked with my Boy as I made love to him.

JoqueThe waistband itself is the most bulky of the straps and is very long. I ended up with so much tucked in that I wonder if a size ‘A’ would have fitted me better; however once in place the excess seemed to sit neatly and not get in the way. The harness also sat naturally quite low under my tummy which felt a little unflattering to my womanly curves. I could have worn the Joque higher around my waist but I prefer a more natural angle for my cock in general.

In summary the harness takes a little adjusting but is then comfortable and usable without being intrusive.

Manufacturers statistics:

Materials: Nylon / Spandex / Velcro
Product Care: Hand wash or machine wash on gentle cycle
Belt: 20″ (A) – 65″ (B)
Leg Straps: 10″ (A) – 24″ (B)
Toy Size (diameter): 3.17–5.08 cm (1.25–2″)
Toy Size (circumference): 9.97 – 15.95 cm (3.92 – 6.28″)

 

Feel free to ask any questions in the comments and I’ll try to answer them.

SpareParts Tomboi – Review

In the interest of full disclosure I should point out that I was sent this item free to review. However this review expresses my own personal and honest opinion and experience.

As someone who has been using a strap-on for a while now, I naturally have an interest in harnesses. It was only recently that I came across a reference to SpareParts and became interested in their products. The Tomboi fascinated me, it is a harness which looks at first glance like boys underwear. They have a wide waistband and are made of nylon and spandex making them both boyish and yet also what Mat would refer to as ‘licky knickers’.Tomboi

The fact that they are underwear style rather than being made up of straps and buckles means that unlike other harnesses which come in a ‘one size fits all’ variant these are sized. The spare parts website has detailed instructions and a helpful video to aid you in choosing a size and it’s worth taking care over.
The first part is simple enough, measure around your hips and compare the measurement to the chart they provide. The second part is more subjective, requiring you to assess yourself in terms of ‘moon shapes’. I struggled with this and indeed required a second and third opinion, the last of which was brave enough to tell me I was a ‘three-quarter moon’ which meant going up a size. I found the sizing slightly distressing. I’m usually a UK size 12-14 which while not petite is not hugely fat either, so ending up deciding I was an XL in the Tomboi felt uncomfortable and left me wondering if I’d really understood the sizing correctly.

They arrived packed in a simple plastic pouch with a cardboard insert looking for all the world simply like a pair of posh underpants. I was frustrated to read that the packaging said ‘wash before use’. It didn’t feel really necessary to do so but I did anyway and waited impatiently for them to dry!

Finally I got to try them on. At this point the agonising over the sizing paid off. I slipped the Tomboi straight on; they felt silky, sexy and comfortable and yes, they fitted. I could easily wear them as underwear under clothes if I wanted to go out ‘prepared for action’ so to speak. After strutting around in them with a smile, it was time to try them with a dildo.

Inner ViewThe front of the harness consists of two overlapping layers of mesh behind the rubber O-ring. There is also a tiny inner pocket in case you need to carry a condom or an emergency fiver (perhaps not). The O-ring itself initially seemed very small and I was uncertain how my biggest dildo (which is about 1.5″/4cm in diameter) would fit. I pulled the harness down slightly, separated the mesh layers, slid the dildo against the hole and was pleasantly surprised when it slipped quite easily through into place. I slipped the mesh back behind the dildo and pulled the Tomboi up again onto my hips.
The dildo sat firmly and comfortably in place, the whole process so much simpler than slipping into my existing harness and trying to fasten the buckles.

Still I hadn’t really tested this yet at all. My Boy goTomboi With Dildot on all fours and I moved in behind him. As I fucked him there was some movement of the fabric between my legs, which I have to admit seemed to be rubbing things nicely. The dildo sat firmly in place and I was pleased to note that the impact did not cause any chafing of the mesh against my pussy, in fact it felt very comfortable.

Next I got Mat to lie on his back and I lifted his legs into the air and slid into him, face to face, looking down at him. This is one of my favourite positions to fuck him in but usually I can do this for only a few seconds before he complains about discomfort from the buckles and straps of my harness. This time there were no complaints and I was able, for the first time, to spend a long time making love to him like this. That simple fact makes me love my Tomboi so much.

When we had finished I pulled out carefully. Because the harness is not wipe clean I took more care than usual to wipe the dildo clean of lube before removing it as it has to pass back through the mesh layers. Although as it can simply be thrown in the washing machine after use this was more fastidiousness on my part than from any real need.

The Tomboi also came with a little black zip-up pouch, presumably for storage. It’s a nice extra but I can’t see me using it normally. I want my harness to be easy to grab at a moments notice after all.

In summary then, the Tomboi is comfortable, easy to use and has just, I suspect, become my preferred harness for day to day use.

Manufacturers statistics:

Materials: 77% Nylon / 23% Spandex
Product Care: Hand wash or machine wash on gentle cycle
Low Waist*: 26″ (XS) – 52″ (3X)
Toy Size (diameter): 3.17–5.71 cm (1.25–2.25″)
Toy Size (circumference): 9.97 – 18.0 cm (3.92 – 7.07″)

*plus the variation for ‘moon-shape’ of course.

Feel free to ask any questions in the comments and I’ll try to answer them.

We-Vibe 3 – Review

The We-Vibe 3 is sold as a “couple’s toy” but it was bought primarily for a slightly different purpose so my review may not be typical.

As with any premium toy the packaging was delightful. An oval cylindrical box containing the vibrator and its remote control in a discreet white case which is both storage and a charging stand. A mains adapter and a slim instruction booklet completed the contents.

The instructions tell you to charge the vibrator for twenty-four hours before use so I plugged it in straight away. A yellow light glows on the case when it is charging but was still lit after the allotted time was up so there appears to be no way to tell if the device is fully charged.

I opened the case regardless and extracted the We-Vibe 3 and its remote control.The device itself is smooth to the touch with no seams (and no power port) rendering it easy to clean and waterproof. The remote control is also tiny and fits easily in the hand with a single thumb shaped button.

The instruction booklet contains an illustration demonstrating which way round the device is to be worn with one end pressing against the clitoris and the other against the g-spot. The two ends are different sizes but the most important difference is that the is a tiny nodule at one end which is on the clitoris end (the diagram helpfully labels the two ends ‘C’ and ‘G’). It also includes a diagram showing that it can be used during penetration.

Once inserted it was time to try and turn it on. Although there is a remote control the initial start up is provided by pressing that tiny nodule which when the toy is in place is almost impossible to find. Once you’ve achieved that however the We-Vibe 3 can be controlled by either pressing that button again (still equally hard to find and how one would get to it with another body pressing against it I have no idea) or by pressing the button on the remote. Either button appears to cycle through a range of vibration patterns, starting with continuous low power, continuous high power, and four variable ones before switching the device off. I’m pleased to note that their website describes the patterns even though the user manual does not.

Now we had acquired the We-Vibe 3 with the intention of using it to provide added stimulation for me while using my strap-on (on my Boy) so the testing then proceeded to the next phase. Because it is a ‘couples toy’ the device itself is small and therefore not inclined to stay put (unless perhaps you’re a lot better at squeezing than I am). Using the straps from the strap-on harness between my legs certainly helped to hold it in place but I certainly had a low confidence in it and too vigorous movement did tend to cause it to slip. An alternative harness might perform better in this regard perhaps.

The other issue I found is more one of physical mismatch. Although the two ends are labelled as ‘clitoris’ and ‘g-spot’, in practice they found neither and although the buzzing is pleasant enough it failed to provide suitable stimulation to produce any kind of climax.

Determined to give the We-Vibe 3 a thorough try out we did attempt to use it during penetration and it certainly was slim enough not to physically impede progress but after only a minute or so my fellow tester declared it ‘distracting’ and we abandoned its use for the duration.

On the whole then the We-Vibe 3 was pleasantly entertaining but certainly not ‘earth shattering’. It remains to be seen whether further investigation will determine how to best use it.

Manufacturers statistics:

Materials: 100% lead-free, phthalate-free medical grade silicone
Size (G): 80 x 28 x 18 mm (3 x 1.1 x 0.7”)
Size (C): 80 x 29 x 21 mm (3 x 1.1 x 0.8″)
Battery: long-lasting rechargeable battery
Charging: wireless charging
User Time: Up to 2 hours
Frequency*: 50Hz – 92Hz
Noise Level**: 2 whisper-quiet motors

*I’ve converted rpm to Hz.
**I attempted to evaluate this by holding the vibrator next to my phone running a sound measuring application and it read 67B on low power and 75dB on high power (but of course it may be different in-situ).

Lelo Mia 2 – Review

I don’t write many reviews because I don’t buy toys very often but in this case I was lucky enough to be given this as a present.

The initial unpacking was an absolute delight. The outer box was simply purple on one side with ‘LELO’ written on it and the reverse has a picture of the toy and a brief description of it. The inner box is completely black (with LELO embossed subtly upon it) and when opened the toy nestles in a black velvety recess. With it is a manual, a credit card like registration card and a sachet of lube.

The Lelo Mia 2 with my largest USB stick for comparison
The Lelo Mia 2 with my largest USB stick for comparison

The Mia 2 itself  is a small lipstick shaped object with a silver band around it. One end is the cap, which twists off to reveal the usb plug for charging. It arrived completely uncharged so the first thing I did was to plug it in to a computer for a while.

The Mia 2 is a little larger and heavier than most memory sticks so you might prefer to plug it in via a cable although it showed no signs of drooping on my computer. When plugged in an led flashes to let you know it’s charging and then glows continuously when charging is complete. As the only branding on the product is the ‘LELO’ on the cap when plugged in it is relatively discreet but the flashing led is bright enough to draw attention to it if people are curious.

While it was charging I decided to sit down with the manual and find out what my new toy could do. This was a slightly disappointing experience. The manual is one of those tiny but thick booklets written in several (twelve) languages. The English section is at the front, and the first couple of pages deals with the warranty information which, naturally, I skimmed over. The next section deals with charging and tells you only to use ‘original chargers provided by LELO’ an instruction I took with a pinch of salt.

Next came the part I was looking for: the controls. I was irritated to find instructions for three, four, two and one button interfaces in this section rather than just the instructions for the Mia 2. My OCD tendencies now flaring at the annoying order of these sections; I had to check which section I needed. I went and looked at my toy (still charging) and then read the relevant instructions.

Being a two button interface there are only plus and minus buttons. The plus turns it on and ramps up the power. Pressing and holding it for a couple of seconds allows you to switch between vibration modes. The minus button returns it to continuous vibration, lowers the power and eventually turns it off.

Having given the toy an initial charge it was time to take it for a test drive, literally. While Mat drove us to see friends, I sat next to him and experimented. There are six vibration patterns and I found one I liked, which I’d describe as waves (the manual failed to describe what the six ‘thrilling’ vibration patterns actually are) and settled back to enjoy it.

Enjoy I certainly did, while small it fits comfortably in my hand and was easy to position. The buttons are silicone covered so it’s easy enough to find them by touch (once you note which is nearest the metal band) and I managed to bring myself to a rather enjoyable orgasm with it.

One downside for me is that there is no power control over the alternative vibration patterns, which leaves some of them simply too strong and the vibration in my hand too intense for my gentle preferences. However between the wave pattern and the standard vibration I was well satisfied and I suspect there’s something here for everyone.

One nice thing is how quiet this toy seems. Even on full power this toy is not really very loud but it is sufficiently buzzy to be too loud to use in the toilets at work discreetly (yes, I tried, purely for research purposes you understand).

The manual also ‘helpfully’ suggests you ‘check whether your LELO is splash-proof or waterproof’. According to the outer box the Mia 2 is waterproof but I’m unsure how fully submersible it is so haven’t yet taken it to play in the bath although washing it under the tap showed no signs of leakage. The cap over the usb connector fits on and twists round a few degrees but it is such a slight twist that I wonder if it would be easy to dislodge during use. I may have to experiment further in this regard.

On the whole though, it is a beautiful, portable toy, which can be carried around easily and charged conveniently which makes it perfect for an ‘emergency wank‘ now and again.

Manufacturers statistics:

Materials: ABS Plastic / Phthalate-Free Silicone
Finish: Glossy ABS Plastic
Size: 111 x 22 x 22mm
Weight: 32g
Battery: Li-lon 70mAh 3.7V
Charging: 1 h at 5.0V 100mA
User Time: Up to 1.5 hours
Standby: Up to 90 days
Frequency: 120Hz
Max Noise Level*: < 50dB

*I attempted to confirm this measurement by holding the vibrator next to my phone running a sound measuring application and it read 55dB on low power and 70dB on full power but I have no measure of the applications accuracy.

Cock Ring – Review

We’d managed a rare trip to Harmony and Perrin and I decided to take advantage of it to buy the Screaming O Plus Vibrating Ring. We don’t often use sex toys like this so this was definitely an experimental purchase for us.
The ring itself comes packaged in a clear plastic pouch and I can’t say it wins any prizes for its appearance. It’s an unnatural peachy colour and looks a lot like some form of creepy crawly. It’s made of a jelly like substance and although the ring was obviously stretchy I was slightly uncertain of whether it would be too tight as apparently one size fits all. Perrin seemed unperturbed by it’s size and reported that it was comfortably snug. The ring is supposed to ensure he ‘stays harder for longer’ but not having found any lack in that direction I can’t say that we tested that claim.
The vibration is activated by squeezing the device. It claims to give thirty minutes of vibration but as it is also single use that was more than we needed on this occasion.
When Perrin started the vibration he certainly seemed to enjoy it.
When he penetrated me it was initially slightly disconcerting. The vibrations travelled along his cock such that it was similar to using a vibrator. Once we started to have sex in earnest the intensity varied for me as Perrin thrust in and out, buzzing against my clit as he was fully inserted. It certainly seemed to hit the right spot and the vibration was gentle enough to enhance the sensation rather than being distracting. After all I was primarily making love to my husband not using a sex toy.
In the end I didn’t actually achieve orgasm from it but it certainly got me closer to it than might otherwise have been the case. On the whole I’d describe it as pleasurable but not mind blowing. So not really living up to its name but good fun all the same.

I’m Polyamorous This Morning

I saw the interview about polyamory on This Morning yesterday and felt fairly disquieted. Certainly the presenters seemed sympathetic enough even if obviously bemused. The ‘relationship expert’ on the other hand was frankly dismissive and disapproving.

She was dismissive partly because the people concerned were all in their twenties, unmarried and childless. One felt she was saying very much “You’ll grow out of this and then regret it”. Perhaps they will. On the other hand, even if they later decide to ‘settle down’ into a monogamous marriage why should that mean that the choices they are making are wrong for them now?

Perrin and I have come at this from the other direction. Starting with the monogamous marriage and then opening out to include others in our lives. I don’t feel that monogamy has failed us, I was happily monogamous for a long time. Why then should polyamory be a failure even if it is not permanent? Why, too, assume that it will fail simply because it fails for some people? A significant percentage of marriages fail, yet no one (hopefully) says to a bride “it’ll end in tears”.

Indeed the lady in question’s attitude seemed to be largely ‘you’re going to get your comeuppance when you get hurt’. Certainly they will get hurt. Every relationship carries with it a certain amount of pain; engaging in more than one at once inevitably increases the potential of getting hurt. But then it increases the potential for joy too, it provides additional support to get one through difficulties and is incredibly rewarding.
I’m sure it’s not for everyone but then there are people who choose to live celibate lives and that’s not for everyone either. It would be lovely if everyone was free to choose the relationships which they desired for themselves without censure.

I found this interview a sad reminder of how many people would fail to understand our own choices, and some of those are people I really don’t want to hurt. Nevertheless it will go some way to raising the issue in some people’s minds, letting them start to question the model of relationships and perhaps one day leading to a little more understanding.
That can only be a good thing.

All credit too to the three brave ladies who kept their cool and put their points across calmly on national television. I’m suitably impressed.