For once we had a house full of people. I took advantage of this opportunity to have my boy sleep on the floor beside my bed. I’d made him up a comfy bed of his own there and it seemed very natural to have him sleep there wearing his lead. The end of the lead looped up onto the bed, and I held it though the night.
For many people a collar is a symbol of submission. I even have two of my own, a play collar and a public collar, both worn as signs of submission to Perrin.
Mat doesn’t have a collar as such; instead he has his lead. a beautiful length of pink rope which loops over his head and acts as a choke collar with a small loop at the other end for my hand to slip through and hold.
When Mat wears his lead, when the rope encircles his neck, then that same rope snakes around my wrist. Binding us together. Submission and dominance woven from the same stuff.
Although many submissives wear collars I’ve never seen any discussion of a similar symbol for dominants. A bracelet to encircle their wrist perhaps?
That seems to me, in one sense, to be a surprising omission. Where once only a woman would be expected to wear a wedding ring these days it is now commonly expected that both parties will wear some token of their union. A mutual sign of commitment.
D/s relationships are certainly a form of commitment. A relationship which requires nurturing and attention, mutual (if somewhat disparate) give and take. They are more than mere play. They define a place and an identity for each party. It is a relationship with possessives; he is my boy; I am his Domme.
When my boy wears his lead I am there holding it; even in my sleep.