Have you ever had someone say something to you that you didn’t know how to respond to? Have you ever been silent because there didn’t seem to be words to express how you feel? Have you ever realised later that perhaps you should have spoken up?
Mat and I were at a play party, our first for far too long. I was delighted to be out with him and had dressed him in some leopard print panties and matching hold ups. He looked sexy, slutty and, well, like a boy whore in the best way. The stockings were striking and had been immediately admired and I was delighted with how he looked on every level.
Then another Domme commented on them, saying ‘you shouldn’t have given him such nice matching stockings that’s not nearly humiliating enough’.
Really? Who was she to comment on his level of humiliation? She could not know whether his outfit was a trial or a treat. Nor could she know what effect I wanted to cause him with his attire. The comment had startled me and I didn’t really know what to say.
Later on in the evening she commented again saying he ‘didn’t deserve such nice stockings with his legs’. This time tact kept me silent, not offended enough to lose my desire not to cause offence in turn. Yet I was offended. Who was she to put down my boy, to insult my submissive?
Still, I had seen her at play with her own submissive. Listened to her verbally abuse and belittle him. That was their style of D/s, their choice.
It is not mine.
My boy was beautiful. His outfit chosen to bring out his slutty submissive side. To show off his legs (which are very attractive) and highlight his male beauty with a feminine contrast. He had every right to be proud of how he looked, of who he was and I in my turn was inordinately proud of him in every way.
I didn’t want to cause offence and I know I can be tactless when I feel defensive and I didn’t want to make anyone feel like I was criticising their relationship style or choices. Yet I wish I had spoken out. I wish I had known how, tactfully, to ask her not to speak of my boy in such a way. He deserves respect and he was under my protection. He deserved better from me.
Mat was everything I could have wished for that night. He was beautiful and slutty and obedient. He was fun and caring and passionate. He was everything I wanted.
He can be proud of who and what he is.
I know I am.