I’m Proud Of My Boy

Have you ever had someone say something to you that you didn’t know how to respond to? Have you ever been silent because there didn’t seem to be words to express how you feel? Have you ever realised later that perhaps you should have spoken up?

Mat and I were at a play party, our first for far too long. I was delighted to be out with him and had dressed him in some leopard print panties and matching hold ups. He looked sexy, slutty and, well, like a boy whore in the best way. The stockings were striking and had been immediately admired and I was delighted with how he looked on every level.

Then another Domme commented on them, saying ‘you shouldn’t have given him such nice matching stockings that’s not nearly humiliating enough’.

Really? Who was she to comment on his level of humiliation? She could not know whether his outfit was a trial or a treat. Nor could she know what effect I wanted to cause him with his attire. The comment had startled me and I didn’t really know what to say.

Later on in the evening she commented again saying he ‘didn’t deserve such nice stockings with his legs’. This time tact kept me silent, not offended enough to lose my desire not to cause offence in turn. Yet I was offended. Who was she to put down my boy, to insult my submissive?

Still, I had seen her at play with her own submissive. Listened to her verbally abuse and belittle him. That was their style of D/s, their choice.
It is not mine.

My boy was beautiful. His outfit chosen to bring out his slutty submissive side. To show off his legs (which are very attractive) and highlight his male beauty with a feminine contrast. He had every right to be proud of how he looked, of who he was and I in my turn was inordinately proud of him in every way.

I didn’t want to cause offence and I know I can be tactless when I feel defensive and I didn’t want to make anyone feel like I was criticising their relationship style or choices. Yet I wish I had spoken out. I wish I had known how, tactfully, to ask her not to speak of my boy in such a way. He deserves respect and he was under my protection. He deserved better from me.

Mat was everything I could have wished for that night. He was beautiful and slutty and obedient. He was fun and caring and passionate. He was everything I wanted.
He can be proud of who and what he is.
I know I am.

Relationships and communication

Have we become too used to modern communication?

When I was growing up, you could write to someone, visit them, or phone them. And you couldn’t leave messages on the phone if no one was there. The phone was attached to the wall too (permanently, in our case), so there was no escaping to the privacy or a bedroom.

This meant we all formed our friendships in person. To talk to a friend, you had to arrange a time where you’d either both be near a phone, or meet in person. Everyone would spend time apart from their friends, and really enjoy the times you had with them.

We now have mobile phones, the Internet, email and Twitter. Our friends can follow our actions almost as we make them, whether they be next door, or the other side of the planet. This is a good thing! Rather than being isolated, everyone (with a computer) can express themselves, find like minded individuals, form friendships that were unimaginable just a few years ago.

And yet…

I think maybe I (we?) might have lost something in this. Where is the trust I used to have, that just because I hadn’t seen my friends for a few weeks over the school holidays, we were no longer friends? Just because a friend has not been in contact, does not mean that they are not a friend, just that you need to catch up.

I write this in part because tomorrow I’m going to be visiting a friend who I have known since I was 12. For most of my adult life, she has been living with her partner, and had been married to him for the last 9 years, or so.

You may note the past tense. In the space between my last contact with her, and now, a gap of over a year, her marriage broke down, and they are now divorced.

While you might argue (rightly imho) that I’ve not been a very good friend, a friend I remain – no question about it, despite the many and various gaps in communication that have occurred in the quarter century that I’ve known her.

I would do well to remember this trust, and apply it to my other friendships, online and offline. Friendships are very important, communication is valuable, but it doesn’t have to happen continuously.


Thank You Note

After all, politeness is important, even in fantasy.

It was an important meeting. She carried a briefcase and an overnight bag to the car, and kissed her husband goodbye. His hand trailed over her breasts, and she flushed slightly as she waved him goodbye, remembering the previous evening. He had found the sharpie in her briefcase, and had written on her breasts and pussy, before making love to her. The words were there still, concealed under her smart suit. She shook her head as if to clear it, she had a busy day ahead of her.

Continue reading “Thank You Note”