Hotel Room

I love hotel rooms. The space is so neutral, not filled with the everyday baggage that pervades your own home.

The room we stayed in for my birthday was all of this; and also spacious and luxurious, a place to stretch out and enjoy. We were meant to be packing up, but we ended up side by side on the sofa. Me stretched out on my stomach along the chaise longue, Perrin sitting alongside me on the rest of the sofa. We talked, about what we’d done during our short break and what we’d not had time for. We were relaxed, happy.

I rolled onto my side and closed my eyes as we talked.

“I’m going to go to sleep” I admitted. I listened to Perrin move around the room,

“No you’re not”.

Whack. The riding crop fell sharply. I gasped. There were four measured strokes. I opened my eyes, no longer feeling in the least sleepy. He ordered me to roll over, and he dealt out the same punishment on the other side. Only then did he order me to undress and kneel over the end of the chaise longue.

I knelt on the floor, eyes closed, body resting comfortably on the sofa, as he prepared my butt plug. I heard him running water and wondered. I didn’t have to wait long, he brought it over, and I felt him press it against me, so warm I was startled. I relaxed, letting him push it into me, revelling in the feeling of it nestling inside me. Then he began to beat me again, I remained in position while he cropped me. Concentrating on remaining still.

Then he fetched the heavy wooden paddle. “I’m going to give you four strokes with this” he told me sternly “and I want you to count them”.

The first blow was intense, I collapsed back down onto my heels, hands still resting on the sofa. I was surprised to realise I was sobbing. I heard his voice through the haze.

“Resume your position” I pushed myself up back over the sofa, still unable to speak. I remained there struggling for composure until I was able to form the required word. “One”.

The second blow was softer than the first. I held still, gasping for air until I uttered a broken “Two”.

The third stroke burned fiercely. I was determined not to test Sir’s patience too far, so I struggled to offer an unsteady “Three”.

The fourth stroke was harsh, I sobbed fiercely, but murmured with relief “Four”.

Perrin’s voice was gentle as he told me I was a good girl. Then he allowed me to recover, before joining him on the bed. I gathered myself, and went to him, and was snuggled in his arms before we made love. The butt plug heightened the sensations and we came together; a crashing wave of pleasure that washed away leaving us totally spent. We dozed then, nestled together, my head resting on his shoulder until we awoke enough to make love again.

I love hotels.

Muffins and More

Perrin brought me breakfast in bed this morning. My absolute favourite breakfast, cheese and bacon muffins (with chive butter). That’s only part of what has made today such a great day for me.

First, some history. We’ve said we are open to playing with others. Well some time ago each of us found a special person to play with. More than just someone to have sex with, these were people we cared for and about. People we wanted to be ‘more than friends’. Any jealousy we might have had about this opening of our hearts to others was automatically offset by the sheer symmetry of it. You love her? Well I love him. Simple.

Life is never that simple. My relationship crumbled. I had hoped to salvage something meaningful from it, but have been dodging the inescapable truth. He’s just not that into me. We may be friends, but we’re not Friends. End of.

But learning that hurts. And in the process I have become fragile, vulnerable, and uncertain. I’ve struggled to write here, finding it hard to find my sexy side. I don’t want to be like that!

So here I am, being brought breakfast in bed. I’m loved, wanted, I’m happy.

Then a switchback; while making my breakfast Perrin has been chatting on twitter, a sexy fun conversation, with another woman. I find this upsetting, which is ridiculous. Objectively, nothing gives me cause for concern.  But I’m unhappy. I’m envious, that he has women to talk to, while I feel alone. No one talks to me that way.

So here is the bit where my husband really loves me. He messages someone who I’d pointed out as interesting, to encourage them to talk to me. Then he makes love to me, and gives me a delightful orgasm, before going away to leave me to chat ‘freely’ with them.

I felt a little out of my depth here, I’d never had that kind of conversation on twitter before. Hey, I’m not sure I’ve ever had that kind of conversation. I did all my dating before mobile phones. you can’t talk dirty on a phone screwed to the wall. As I lay there, I realised how excited I was by this, talking dirty with a relative stranger. I relaxed into it, and let his images carry me away, secure in the knowledge that Perrin wanted me to enjoy this moment. Suddenly there I was, cumming, for the second time that day, this time for another man.

That moment buoyed me up, let me feel truly sexy again. I have been smiling all day. A smile only made wider when my sexy husband made love to me yet again earlier, and gave me my third orgasm of the day. Me, who usually struggles to have one!

I feel like myself again, for the first time in ages. It’s a good feeling.

My first night away

In a recent post, Caitlin mentioned our plans for playing with others. We’ve had a little experience over the years, and a bit more recently, but last week was the first time I’ve played with someone alone.

To give a little background, our relationship works because of the rules we set, and one that we set pretty early on was the difference between oral and penetrative sex. Caitlin has not had much experience of penetrative sex, as she feels that this is more special than giving pleasure to another in other ways. It requires more trust, and emotion – more of a connection with the other person.

Despite being a boy, and genetically more predisposed to “putting it about”, I’ve really come to appreciate this view.

We’ve been lucky enough to meet such a person, that we both liked and trusted, and she has become the first person I’ve had penetrative sex with since meeting Caitlin. As this was a big thing for us, Caitlin was also participating, which only made it all the more special for me, and, I hope, for Caitlin and her. Caitlin may write on this subject later.

The real subject of this post is that we got to take this to a new level last week when an opportunity arose for me to spend the night away with my new lover. Just writing this has me reliving the experience, one of the most enjoyable, emotional nights I’ve ever had. From the first moments after meeting up outside the tube, to when we parted the next day, we were focused on each other. Touches, looks, words, kisses. All intense and full of desire.

The other amazing thing, for me was falling asleep with her in my arms, and then waking up with her in the morning. Watching her calm sleeping face in the moments before she awoke, brought home to me the trust that sleeping with someone requires. Her smile, as she awoke, and saw me, was a delight.

At the same time, I had the knowledge that Caitlin wanted this for me. She had encouraged me to set it up, and had been full of love when she left for work.

Upon my return and hers from work, Caitlin and I shared a lingering kiss, before retiring to bed for some passionate love making of our own.

What a gift. From both of them. I am so lucky! Whatever can I give them in return?

Play with Us

Recently the topic of polyamory and sex with others seems to have become a hot topic, so here’s my take on it.

Perrin and I are open to the idea of play with other people. In reality though it’s not as simple as having sex with anybody you meet.

I guess the first point is that our relationship is strong and happy, sexually and platonically. I think it’s something which we feel free to indulge in now, when our own relationship can withstand any difficult moments. That relationship though comes first and that means a number of things.

It means that we share our fantasies, and our adventures. We discuss and enjoy the possibilities together even when the topic may be one of us having sex apart. There are no secrets. We’re honest about our feelings.

We set ground rules together, both general and specific and we stick to them (or explicitly agree to change them).

We each have a veto on any activity at any time. I’m only human, some days I’m happy (or even eager) to share, on others I need to pull back and demand my husband’s exclusive attention. Knowing that I’ll get it when I need it certainly enables me to share more easily. Knowing too that pangs of jealousy can be discussed, and soothed or respected as necessary is also important.

We’re choosy. We both have to feel comfortable with what we do and with whom. For me, there needs to be sexual chemistry, but also emotional and intellectual connection of some degree. Any partner has to be someone we’re both comfortable with. As I’ve explained, this isn’t an on off switch though. The rules can be complicated and changeable over time.

This sounds very selfish, and maybe it is, but first and foremost it protects our marriage which quite honestly is more important than casual sex with anybody no matter how desirable.

The best bit though, is that this framework means that we can play with others and enjoy it fully.

And really the buzz of your spouse helping you get ready to meet a lover is like nothing else. Not to mention the reaction when you get home.


New Experiences

I guess it goes without saying that Perrin and I have an interesting relationship. As such, we’re quite open to experimenting and exploring new types of play.

As always, we tend to discuss and plan extensively, and that preparation tends to ensure things go smoothly for both of us.

Recently a few interesting opportunities have presented themselves. One of these has certainly involved several interesting ‘firsts’, and I’m pleased to find that the result has so far been entirely positive in a number of delightful ways.

However I’m now facing a bit of a dilemma. Yet another exciting opportunity has been offered, and in many ways I’m extremely eager to grasp it. Some aspects of the plan however leave me extremely unsettled and nervous.

It would be easy enough to walk away at this point, but I’m aware that this would disappoint people, and quite honestly I’d hate myself for being a coward. On the other hand I’m simply not sure I’m capable of what is being asked, and I’d really hate to do a bad job, or even worse freeze up completely and be unable to do any job (which is definitely the worst outcome of all).

My usual response to this ‘performance anxiety’ would be to rehearse extensively, but some things you simply can’t rehearse for.

So potentially, one of the best experiences of my life, or possibly one of the worst. What do I do?

I think I look for Perrin’s hand to hold, and see if he can guide me through, as he always has before.

Pet Play

We’ve been so busy recently that this writing this post got delayed, but it was too much fun not to mention.

So Perrin and I had a quiet Friday evening, and we agreed that we wanted to spend it playing.

It started innocently enough with a trip to the supermarket to pick up supplies for dinner and our play. I was nervous about what Perrin had planned, and he put me out of my misery enough to let me know he planned for me to be a pet for the first part of the evening. I became increasingly confused as we went round the supermarket, although we picked up things for dinner; mainly steak and red wine, there was nothing that gave me any clue to the evening ahead.

When we got home, Perrin ordered me to get naked and fetch my collar and leash.  Once he had collared me, he ordered me onto my knees and told me I wasn’t to stand up again. Then he took me for a walk round the house.  I followed him on all fours, as closely as I could, but we have hard floors and it was a struggle.

I was struck by the fact that I knew I hadn’t wanted pain play this evening, but somehow still had to endure the pain in my knees.  He walked me into the kitchen and then ‘fastened’ my leash to a chair while he started on dinner. Then he started muttering.

“Poor thing, you must be thirsty”

He filled a bowl with water and put it on the floor for me to drink.

I struggled with this. Clearly (although nothing was said) using my hands was not an option, but I couldn’t help worry that I’d look silly.  However, (although nothing was said) I’d figured that talking wasn’t really on either (apart from the occasional ‘yes Sir’),  so I had to work through this struggle in my head.  Usually I’d be talking back to cover my awkwardness. Eventually I gave up, and buried my face in the bowl. I got water up my nose, but at least managed to drink it all, and I hoped, come out of it with some cute wet puppy charm.

I must have done ok, because Perrin gave me a ‘doggy treat’ – a piece of raw steak. After the first shock, it tasted delicious. I like my steak rare anyway, but I think that’s the first time I’ve eaten it cold.

Then we were off for another walk around the house. We went and looked out of the window, where my Master peered out of the window and expressed regret that it was too wet to go outside.

I looked pitiful and made sad puppy noises (yes, the rational part of me knew that was a mistake).

So off we went to the garden, and I was taken for a little walk in the rain. The decking was hard on my knees and almost as cold as snow, but the grass was much softer, and warmer.

I was getting comfortable with my puppy self now, and tracked happily back to the kitchen, where I was given another bowl of water. This time I approached it with eagerness, feeling completely comfortable lapping at the water (it still got up my nose).

Perrin was getting on with making dinner, and I realised that he had forgotten to fasten my leash to the chair. I felt the need to do something about this, and considered making a break out of the kitchen, but I didn’t want to be a bad puppy, so instead I went and nuzzled my puppy head against his legs. He stroked my fur, and told me I was a good puppy. Heaven.

‘I want to do non-puppy things to you’ he said suddenly.

I was suddenly aware how wet I was, although I’d not been aware of being turned on at all. I nuzzled at his crotch obediently, and was rewarded with his cock to suck. Before I’d really had enough, he moved round behind me, to take me doggy fashion.

Before either of us had come though, he decided to stop so he could finish dinner, when I got to be human again, and the night was still in no way over.