I think I’m depressed.
That is, feeling worse than just feeling a bit low. I’m not very depressed, certainly not enough (at the moment) to require anything other than the love of Caitlin and support of my friends, but I’m certainly not as happy and as confident as I should be.
The problem with this is that as I’ve been feeling low, I’ve been hiding away. Not talking to friends, and even pushing my beloved Caitlin away at times. I have not been good company.
It’s here that I’m beginning to understand the stigma of admitting depression. Its a disease, like any other, yet why are we so afraid of admitting it? In doing so, and writing about it here, I believe it will help me. I’m lucky that this is only a very mild bout. Some people I’m close to have been on medication for years — that’s no easy thing to deal with. In some ways, its easier to admit that I’m poly and kinky, demonstrably so, in fact, as I’ve been writing about it here for some time!
Now to address some of my symptoms: I have been being very withdrawn and silent. To my friends: I’m sorry about that, please be patient, and understanding if I appear to be ignoring you. I’m not, just unable to provide an answer at this time.
I’m also having problems getting off my arse and doing things, so please feel free to tell me to get on and do something 😉
That’s all for the moment.