Deep HeatIronically, the Deep Heat had been bought originally to torture my Boy. On that occasion it had been unneeded and so it had made its way unopened into the medicine cabinet. Now it found its way out to be used to bring relief to Mat’s aching back.

While I had him lying still, I trailed my slightly contaminated fingers over his cock and watched his reactions blossom. This was clearly an avenue that needed pursuing.

“I want to be tortured by you” he whispered softly. A request no loving Domme could ignore.

Later on, we made the time to play. I took rope (for the first time in, oh, far too long) and wrapped it around his wrists. Pulling them then behind his head and taking the rope around his arms I made sure he knew that he would be lying back, unable to interfere with my pleasure. Once he had lain back with a pillow tucked under his head to ensure his comfort I fastened the end of the rope to the bed. He wasn’t going anywhere.

I opened the tube of deep heat and smeared the merest dab on the head of his cock. He complained he could hardly feel it. I grinned, I hadn’t even got started yet. I took my time, applying the cream to different areas of his cock, watching his reactions, asking for feedback; warming him up gently. His cock was hard, this was pleasure interspersed with pain.

I was aware of just how turned on I was. Enjoying the irony that Mat’s cock was something I simply couldn’t have for now. Still I had something better than sex at that moment.

I continued to torture his cock. Wrapping ribbon tightly around his balls to heighten his sensations I moved to slapping them gently while my hand continued to stroke his gently burning cock. As always, the noises my Boy makes while being tortured drove me on. I was in no hurry.

Still finally, he told me how ready he was.
“If you want me to cum”, he said,”you’re going to need to hit me harder and use a lot more deep heat”.
How could I refuse. With a fresh application of cream I continued my ministrations. I knew he hadn’t thought this through. With a deep sense of evil delight I knew this was going to hurt. So soon, he was gasping harder, and his head tipped back.
“May I cum?” his simple question.
“Oh, yes”, I breathed as I stroked him and watched his body convulse and his spunk shoot into the air.

“It’s burning, it’s burning” as his pleasure subsided the pain kicked in.
“Oh god, it hurts” he moaned. Still helpless, he whimpered in the aftermath of orgasm. This was the pain I had been saving up for him. This was my rush of pleasure.

Gently now, I untied him and held him, comforting, loving my brave Boy who had taken the torture for me and loved me still. How warmly I loved him in that moment.

©Mishman of Undercover Bondage

©Mishman of Undercover Bondage

Because really, who doesn’t want to be worshipped.

Happy HNT!

I’m not feeling great at the moment. It’s nothing more serious than a cold but between the cough, sinus pain, and general feeling of exhaustion I’ve been struggling to get through the last few days. Yet, while I feel pretty dreadful I still have a beautiful submissive Boy who, I feel, deserves far more attention from me than he is currently getting.

This would probably be getting me down more if I hadn’t read a blog a long time ago (that I can sadly no longer find) of a submissive and his Mistress. I remember that she was long term sick, I think possibly confined to a wheelchair, yet they managed to sustain a D/s relationship.

I recall him writing, explaining how she was unable to do much physically to him although she would occasionally employ a proxy to play with him at her direction. Instead their dynamic had shifted to a largely service oriented one in which his submission was to take care of her.

At the time (and I was still submissive myself in those days) I was struck by the affection in his writing, in his acceptance of the limitations of their situation and the way in which they made the relationship work despite the difficulties.

Now other aspects occur to me too. I am, after all, never physically stronger than my submissive even when I am well. His service is his choice and treasured for all that. I am still his Domme however, shaping our world, giving us a place where we can love in our own way.

Something to hold on to until I feel well enough to abuse him more thoroughly.

Bathroom Seen

Click for bigger!

A slightly different surprise this Saturday. Hotels are wonderful places to explore and each hotel room comes with its own delights but in this case I got a surprise when I realised that the bathroom was separated from the bedroom by a pane of slightly obscured glass. Thus giving the opportunity for a photograph like this.

If you’d like to play along then please comment below and I’ll come and share your surprises too.

Surprise Saturday

You know how it is; you’ve had a wonderful weekend. There has been fun, passion and wonder. Then Monday comes and you’re sitting in the office remembering the weekend and looking forward to another chance to do it all again.

Sonnet VII – Monday

Can Monday be the day I miss you most?
I feel your absence keenest from my side,
The empty space where weekend love could boast
You were within and did with me abide.
I cling to memories of what we shared
As overhanging branch for drowning men.
Reliving each sweet proof that then you cared
And feeling passion’s heat fill me again.
But phantom kisses cannot warm me still
Unless our love extends into my week,
I need to know that I make your heart thrill
And so, I long to hear, you thusly speak.
So now my heart leaps forward to the time
Your arms and hands and mouth tell me you’re mine.

© Caitlin 2014

Service LIft

Click to see more!

What should you find by the hotel service lift?

My Boy waits in a pool of light, face upturned, mouth open, ready to be of whatever filthy service you require.

Surprise Saturday

I love it when my boy comes to me submissively and kneels at my feet or snuggles his head against me.
I love it when 
my boy looks up at me, and says ‘may I ask you something’?
I love it when, permission granted, he then shares his little fantasy with me.
Sometimes he wants impossibly difficult things (I’m still looking for someone to whore my boy to), and sometimes he wants simple things, maybe just for me to hurt him in a particular way.

At one level I’m very grateful for these questions. I’m happy that he feels secure enough to share his fantasies, pleased that he’s giving me feedback about what scenes really work for him. On the other hand, I can’t help wondering if these requests are a subtle sign that I’m not being Domme-ly enough, not requiring enough from him.

A Domme’s necessary sanity check asks, am I failing to meet his needs? Do I need to give him more tasks, hurt him more often or even find more times for us to go out and play?

Beyond those practical details lies a more fundamental thought. Is he struggling to feel submissive to me? Does he truly see me as his Domme or merely as someone playing a role to please him?

Still I can imagine my boy finding it all too easy to tell me to my face if he wasn’t happy in my dominance. So I’m content to believe that the requests are what they seem. A boy seeking attention and pampering (of a very special sort) from his Domme. And that is something I am very happy to provide him.

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